Learning to Bridge the Generation Gap in the Workplace

Although not as obvious or often talked about as other diversity issues, generational differences can cause conflict, disruption and team dysfunction in the workplace.  By understanding, recognizing, and appreciating the differences, not only can conflict be avoided but value and opportunity can be found in utilizing generational differences to a workplace advantage.

Today’s workplace has four distinct generations working together:

• Traditionalists or Veterans (born approximately 1922–45)
• Baby Boomers (1946–60)
• Generation X (1961–80)
• Millennials or Generation Y (1981–?)

Because of generational differences, workers may clash over work ethics, acceptable work hours, or perceptions that co-workers from other generations are over- or under-reliant on technology.  This is often due to the different world events and culture, which influenced the different periods in which workers were growing up.

Traditionalists and older Baby Boomers grew up in a world where job loyalty was an expectation and work was seen as a privilege.  They were influenced by the World War II, the Korean War and by Watergate.  Baby Boomers grew up in a more chaotic era of protests over the Vietnam War and the assassinations of John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King.  Generations X and Y had much different influences on their lives such as high rates of divorce, Middle East wars and 9/11.  These world events, together with the icons, music and symbols of the ages, have an influence on our values and our ability to understand those who had different influences.

One Boomer said to me in a workshop that he had a high value for loyalty to his employer until he was laid off.  Now he understands why many younger workers build their resumes by working for several employers instead of just one.  Instead of gaining insights the hard way, managers and employees can learn about generational differences and how to best work with them by attending workshops where, through dialogue and facilitation, workers can learn what values each generation holds dear, how to best leverage the assets each generation brings and how to recruit and retain valuable workers by paying attention to their differing needs.

Accord & Collaboration offers workshops on “Learning to Bridge the Generation Gap in the Workplace” as well as workshops that teach people better communication skills in the workplace such as “Interdependent Communication” and “Conflict Resolution”.  Contact us for more information at dee@acdrs.net.

 

Interdependent Communication

A new study from the University of Washington says graduate programs need to teach students even more. The study found that students need to learn not just how to be scholars but how to live in the real world including how to get along with others in the workplace.

In other words, the study supports what many consultants already advise, that organizations are not things, they are patterns of interaction and that communication is interdependent.

When communication is interdependent, what one person says is heard, received and fully understood by another. If the message is not heard, there is no forward motion, if a message is not well-received, there may be conflict that stalls or moves an organization backwards. And if a message is misunderstood, conflict and chaos may result. However when communication is effective and conflicts are avoided or brought to satisfactory resolution, the organization will thrive.

Interdependent conversations, also known as learning conversations, are conversations which enhance learning about self and others. Learning conversations are empowering, but they are usually difficult conversations to hold. They may be held when a concern needs to be expressed or an expectation was not met. They might be held when constructive criticism is called for. In any event, expectations are placed up front, assumptions, if made, are checked for veracity, and all available intelligence is used without fear that certain opinions or viewpoints won’t be accepted.

People can learn how to hold a learning conversation through training by consultants in dispute resolution and through support of their organization. When conflict is high, a neutral third person in the form of a mediator can help the parties hold learning conversations. When conflict is very high and cooperation low, a conflict coach may be appropriate to help one of the parties take a learning stance, a technique that tends to de-escalate conflict and pave the way for better communication.

When individuals and organizations are interested in achieving long term goals, goals which invariably depend upon the preservation rather than destruction of relationships, communication that stresses interdependence is the only way to go. Through such communication, there can be utilization of both yours and the other’s best talents. Through interdependent communication, we can find ourselves getting along well and making a real difference in whatever work we choose to do.

Motivational Interviewing for Positive Change

by Dee Knapp

All around the country I have partnered with Ted Hunter of Sound Law Center to give talks based on the book “Motivational Interviewing”, S. Rollnick and W. Miller, Guilford Press, 2nd Ed. 2002. Rollnick and Miller, describe an evidence-based approach, used in clinical settings, to help people overcome the ambivalence that prevents them from making positive changes in their lives. My talks were focused on how to apply this technique in the workplace setting, including in workplace mediations. Although these techniques are often used in a clinical setting, one can learn from the basic principles and applications how to approach tough situations where a more directive approach is not appropriate or hasn’t worked.

Motivational interviewing is based upon four principles:

1. Express empathy–Acknowledging a person’s struggles and challenges without judgment, gives them the freedom to change. Skillful reflective listening is essential.

2. Develop discrepancy–Ambivalence is not an obstacle to change, it can actually be the catalyst to change. When a behavior comes into conflict with a deeply held value, it is usually the behavior that changes. In that way ambivalence can make change possible.

3. Roll with resistance–Reluctance to change is natural. It is important to not argue for change. Invite new perspectives but don’t impose them.

4. Support self-efficacy–A person’s belief in the possibility of change is an important motivator. Therefore when the “interviewer” has and expresses a belief in the person’s ability to change, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Motivation to change is elicited from the “interviewee”, and not imposed from without.

Although not appropriate for every situation, these techniques may be useful in the workplace to help people move out of unproductive behaviors into new ones that better serve them and the mission of the workplace. They can also be used effectively by mediators in a mediation setting, to change attitudes and behaviors, dissolve impasse and make way for successful resolution.

Don’t Negotiate, Collaborate!

Tricks, power-plays, passive-aggressive maneuvers,“getting taken”, or being played the fool, even simple misunderstandings. Yikes, no wonder people don’t like to negotiate! But negotiation doesn’t have to be this way–even if one side seems not to “play fair”–if you enter the conversation with the intent to collaborate. Here are some tips for a successful collaboration:

1. Prepare. Think ahead of time about what you really want. Think about what is realistic, maybe do some research. Talk to other people or look at articles and books. Decide why you want what you want, why it is fair and what support is out there for your position. Then think about what the other side may want, and if possible, do the same research. Finally, decide ahead of time, what is the best thing you could get elsewhere, or what your best alternatives are, if you don’t reach a negotiated agreement. If you find yourself in an on-the-spot negotiation, ask for any time you need. Say “I’ll get back to you” and continue the negotiation at a time when you are better prepared.

2. Focus on interests, not positions. Once you’ve done your preparation and have entered the negotiation, focus on the reasons why you want what you want. Ask questions and learn as much as possible about where the other side is coming from. Find out what is really important to both of you and steer the conversation in that direction.

3. Put the negotiation into perspective. Think about your long-term goals and the relationship you have with the other party. Don’t just think about winning or you may miss opportunities for growth and connection that can serve you in the long-run.

4. Create options. Use your creativity. Brainstorm a series of ideas and don’t judge them until all are out on the table. Usually there are many different roads to resolution, don’t be afraid to explore them.

5. Don’t lose your cool. Remember that to get respect, you need to give respect. Keep your goals for a successful collaboration in mind at all times.

In the workplace, employees and managers at all levels find themselves in negotiation every day. You negotiate with your boss, your subordinates, your peers, your subcontractors, your labor unions, or your customers. It can be easy or it can be terrifying. Try these tips and remember, don’t negotiate, collaborate!

Mediation in the News

Mediation and other types of collaborative processes including those in the workplace, appear in the news everyday. A recent search turned up several articles that are representative of the kind of collaborative process or mediation that gets press attention. For example, the Voice of America reported that South African President Thabo Mbeki has been facilitating the negotiations between Zimbabwe’s ruling party and the opposition movement, a role a head of state will often play. Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez was reportedly attempting to act as a mediator to obtain the release of 45 hostages from the Columbian Revolutionary Armed Forces.

Other articles report about government programs. Recently the Iowa Attorney General set up a mediation program employing a non-profit mediation service in Iowa to help renegotiate thousands of loans between farmers and home loan mortgage companies which would otherwise end up in foreclosure.

And, in Hawaii, an article appeared in a publication called The Molokai Dispatch reporting about the benefits of divorce mediation.

Workplace mediation, also appears in the news, but not in a way that the employers want to see. Usually, it’s a labor/management contract negotiation that has reached impasse such as the dispute in Oregon between a school district and a teacher’s union where the teachers have requested the assistance of a mediator.

And there are other times, when an organization probably wishes they had turned to mediation sooner when the matter was less visible, such as when parties turn to mediation to settle discrimination charges filed in court. In Zanesville, Ohio, the newspapers are reporting that residents of a neighborhood called Coal Run are charging the city and county with discrimination in their provision of water services and are now turning to a mediator for assistance in settling the suit.

Usually not reported are the hundreds of mediations occurring in the workplace, which have successfully resolved charges of discrimination or some other kind of unfair treatment. When matters are resolved early and to the satisfaction of the parties through mediation, it is not necessarily a newsworthy event. We, in the mediation community, can be proud of our efforts, which keep employers out of the news, make for more productive working relationships and helps workers feel respected and acknowledged.

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http://www.forbes.com/feeds/ap/2007/09/11/ap4107366.html

http://www.themolokaidispatch.com/node/1122

http://blog.oregonlive.com/breakingnews/2007/09/tigardtualatin_teachers_union.html

http://www.centralohio.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/BA/20070912/NEWS01/709120305/1002